The 2011 ‘Jacket Fest, much like the two previous years, was a gigantic failure, when literally zero people showed up for the event. 

“We were sure this year’s Fest would attract at least one person,” commented Jackie Anderson, a ‘Jacket Fest coordinator. “But it didn’t, and we’re still trying to figure out why,” she added.

“This year’s Jacket Fest included over thirty tables, some of them in the grass, some of them on the sidewalk, and even some inside!  We had brown tables, green tables, and even some picnic tables.  We are baffled that not a soul bothered to come.” 

After last year’s dismal turnout, it was concluded that UWS needed to put out more tables, so it did.  Event coordinators were sure that the additional tables this year would guarantee a crowd, but still nobody came.  “The problem was, nobody was giving away disgusting protein bars,” urged a student, who contemplated attending Jacket Fest, but ultimately decided not to go. “Had there been a vendor or two handing out samples of awful nutritional supplements, yeah, I might have gone.”  

Ideas for next year’s Jacket Fest include actually having people sit at the tables, and also having additional, intrigued people walk past the tables.